Mah Johbe

In exchange for legal tender (well, digital tender - that is, credit) I work in my college library's cataloguing department. I process newly-received books so they are fit to go on the library's shelves. That means I affix the Library of Congress labels to the side, put in the "date due" card, the little thing that makes the security system know when you're stealing a book, etc. It's alright. There are other grunts in there - one a total babe. Which is nice. When we all talk it's pleasant, and when we don't I listen to music. I get to glance through the books as I process them, which can be rewarding.

The soul-draining aspect of it is that ANYONE could do this job. As someone who wants to be an artist (an endeavour which by definition requires the essence of the individual) I find this particularly devastating. I feel like a machine. It grinds me down.

So next time you check out a library book, think of me, think of me.



sitting in a little chair, listening to music / talking while affixing labels, stamping, writing down numbers, looking at books, etc.: **

Emotional Trauma

Last week, the relationship between me and my ex-girlfriend imploded. We had broken up a month before, and continued a sometimes-difficult but always rewarding friendship. Until she stopped emailing me for a week (we go to different colleges). When we finally talked, I exploded at her unexplained silence, and the resulting conversation ended with us deciding not to communicate with each other for a couple weeks, until we see each other in person at home during Spring Break.

Hurt, angry, feeling unloved and unnecessary, I had to go to my Astro lab, across campus. During that long walk I listened to The Besnard Lakes' "Because Tonight," feeling more alive and present and rooted in the world than I had for a long time. I was aware of myself because that self had been flayed, but that awareness itself, in the anguish and frustration, was such a powerful and beautiful thing, available only at heights of emotional trauma and rapture.



suffering a relationship breakdown with my ex-girlfriend and walking through the cold to astro lab while listening to the besnard lakes' "because tonight": *****

Bon Appetit and its Failures

Tonight, Bon Appetit maliciously withheld most of the food we had ordered. We received some peanut butter, some jelly, some ham gristle, and cheerios. The rest, I believe, was actually intended to be sent to the nearby Umatilla weapon dump.

Anyway, we just went to Prentiss and had dinner there, which was pretty good. I had pepperoni pizza and we talked about our first fights and lecherous Europeans.



when the bins fail to yield a dinner and we all go to Prentiss to get our own: ***

Welcome

This is my new blog, where I will rate things I do on a five-star scale. Simple, yet absurd.

Please enjoy!